Wednesday, August 31, 2005
HAPPY TEACHERS' DAY TO ALL THE TEACHERS OUT THR..am missing ms leong so bad...smsed her juz now..n i intend to keep her sms forever...haha...went back to IJ too...am happy happy happy..haha..really felt so at hm..dya kno i was lyk thinking cj wld only end at 11 or smth...but in the end we ended at 9 n were let off early...THANK GOD...went back wid clare jo nives n fran....I MISS IJ SOOOOOO MUCH...arghss...went mad wen i saw mrs alex...then was toking to her for a short while wid miss chow oso...toking abt MRS SNG!!!!...n miss chow was saying so much funny stuff...isnt it so funny how sng taught mag low first then annabel chow n now she's teaching me n nives...n both me n nives were mag low's n chow's students.....its really quite cool u kno...n went to see SUSA...haha..yea..i was so pissed wid the sec ones..gosh cld slap them....sickening shits....anyways yea..tmw intensive tamil wid susa for mock paper...hehe...YAY...at least she is willing to TEACH unlyk stupid kotti...nvm...hmphhhh....
after tt went to see mag low...gosh i saw a
WHOLE NEW SIDE of her today...u kno wen i went to her hse today i actually realised how much i actually miss IJ n wana be back in 4/7 wid evrybody again...but yea..n i felt lyk i missed mag low so much...but i think its cuz i was toking to her quite a lot...as in we spent abt 3 hrs wid her u kno...oh yea...i went wid sme pple frm priya's class n priya dearest herself....n nives came too...felt lyk i missed mag low so much..well praying for her to heal soon..hais...toked abt lots of stuff man..even val came into the picture...yea...hais...i miss IJ on the whole...yea saw evan too...
then after tt went to eat wid belle n priya...then went to get priya's shoes...in woodlands...saw chris n sinthu for awhile wid suranth...n suranth is soooooooooooooooooooooooooooo cute...he was showing me his boxing moves...n his smile....is so so so so cute la...
after tt went mr muthu hse..slck thr..n
I MISS JEFFREY.........im sucha crap la...i ask him come then come late..hais...fck it la...wen i got off 913 i saw him getting on the 913 opp the road...n i was lyk 'sorry jeff....'....i felt so rotten la..wanted to tok to him somemore...i dun care...after the damn promos we BETTER meet as a grp n go visit him...hais...miss being together...as ive mentioned before....had fun in tuition today..read this maths bk..n also fell aslp AFTER going thru the book tho..felt fricking tired...so we left first wid fariha cuz she wanted to get this card...
then wen we were leaving mr muthu hse chris sinthu n kabeelan were coming...nuts...yea...wen me jay n fariha were in cwp...i saw sarasha,raja n ravi.....i mean i din see them but they saw me n saradha lyk tapped me..n i turned to stare at her...n hell i was shocked..dun ask me y...but i juz was..so i juz said hi n then said hi to the guys oso..toked a bit then they left...well all the best to them for their As...i juz felt vry uncomfy ard them...i mean its not lyk i tok to them much n stuff la...it was juz weird..vry difficult to tok to them oso..duno la..n smehow i feel tt they r juz obliged to tok to me or smth...hais..nvm la...went to mini toons after tt...went a bit mad looking at the pink caps...then took a foto of myself in this cap...i LOVE the foto la..been admiring it since i took it...haha..ego ego...see my head getting bigger...
been thinking tt i actually lyk my class...a bit weird la..but its true..maybe not the whole class but a few of my classmates...i quite lyk them..been enjoying myself lately la...but wen laureen leaves......hais...will prolly hafta sit wid vanessa again or smth..........................................i never do get the best seats....
i //young of the butterfly// you 10:33 PM
Monday, August 29, 2005
i think i haven had so much fun in a long time....
went out wid
michelle,marianne,william n
yijie after sch..really fun man...we doing tt crazy stuff in mos....i duno but asking those illogical ques which were really crappy n funny n michelle was lyk always the last to get them..but she's damn cute n funny la..haha...had a great time wid them...n william juz reminds me of sathesh man...eunice left instead of coming wid us....but i think i really enjoyed myself wid them today..but i think its partially cuz michelle was thr..i duno if i wld haf enojyed myself as much if she din come...
after tt met my dearest
PRIYA in novena LJS..wid belle jenny n nisha...haha...thr anothr crap la..they were toking abt ghosts,demons n all tt stuff got scared n priya wanted me to follow her hm...ttz y she called me...nonsense..yea still met her anyway..might be going for tt drama thing on fri wid the IJ peeps..haha..fun fun...but then again i really hope they do go...wld be nice la going wid them..shlf haf asked priya for the PAC thing...n im lyk super broke now la...no money..then priya want me go watch so many movies..hais...no money...must get frm mum...
well neways juz wanted to say i had a great day today...n cuz of william im missing sathesh so bad....needing to see him soon...
i //young of the butterfly// you 8:00 PM
Sunday, August 28, 2005
SAT was great..
morning had tuition wid ananthi...i think ananthi is really funny..the IJ element is still in her man..seriously...she is juz damn nice la...so drama n funny...then she tells me abt her NTU experiences n all..they're really funny la...n she tells me abt all the weird ppl thr..n her weird PW ppl...hahaha....madness..
after tt went to chris's hse to borrow clothes again...missed her so much..haven seen her in lyk ages..so long man...hais..but luckily i got to spend time wid her...
after tt went to mr muthu hse...i miss having so much of fun thr..n i miss jeffrey..so long never see him..maybe aftr promos me jay ash him shld go back together..then can crap lyk nobody's business..fun fun fun...i miss lyk being wid them ..juz being thr was so fun..i mean we did our studying n all wad...n we did do quite ok for the Os...hais juz miss all of them..n i think mr muthu was one person who made a huge huge impact in my life...hais...miss the whole atmosphere...
well after tt went to salon for treatment..n then dinner..toked abt aussie over dinner again...not vry nice la..i mean i feel super fucked up after hearing wad my mum said..i understand her situation but then again if it carries on i will never be able to achieve my dreams..im selfish n being a bitch i kno..but i'll feel lyk crap if i were to sacrifice my dreams for my bros...dun ask me..im juz damn sad abt it...n i mean its at times lyk this i really really question God y cldnt He haf made us richer...i dun want the money for a big hse or a car or anything EXCEPT education for my bros n me...ttz all really..i juz want to go aussie n study...n come back n give my parents a WONDERFUL life...but.........................i dun think its gona happen..im juz lying to myself evrytime i say im gona go..im gona go..its a lie to myself....n i telling u sme rich asses can afford to screw up their studies n go overseas cuz they haf the damned money...but i dun screw up n i so bady wana go overseas but i cant cuz thrs no money..God will u ever help me?
today went church wid priya...after tt went FEP wid her n ruby..quite fun la..missed walking ard FEP wid ppl...juz spending a long long long long time thr...bought rubber bands...felt lyk buying all the jewellery but not lyk im gona wear clothes to suit them..so yea..juz needing to buy shoes n bags...shoulder bags but big enuff to hold all my stuff...maybe can drag mum to buy one on sat...suta n all came over today...but i slept wen they came..haha..was fricking tired..neways gona mug after tis...cant send my EoM to miss chok..am so screwed..
monan's coming back nxt month..duno wen...promos r also coming nxt month..he always comes back at the wrong times..but at least he comes back..
got so much to say right now but i really need to go study...ARGHS....
i //young of the butterfly// you 8:41 PM
Wednesday, August 24, 2005
im lyk pissed k..ms tan has been dragging the econs test la..i kno on mon it was my fault for not doing it n wanting to go out wid the girls...im sorry but i really wanted to do the test on tues...n she was missing..n today it seems she din even come up to class la..im gona insist she gives me the test tmw morn n i i'll hand it up to her by tmw afetrnoon....its seriously screwed up la...i wana get it over n done wid lyk as soon as possible..i got a fricking maths test tmw which im sure im gona screw up tho i so badly want full marks...
fri is the PAC opening ceremony n all tt crap..wanted to go...but no one to go wid...going wid my class.....i will juz feel so left out n xtra so yea...forget it...
my fcking PW is so screwed..i cant even find an artice to work on n the deadline is fri..i thot they had spare articles but none of them did..u kno if my mum juz says ONE word tt i can go aussie i wldnt be giving a FUCK abt tis dumbass sub...its taking up so much of time..no one is BOTHERING to do the survey at all n i hafta give it out myself....i do stuff n they all dun even appreciate it la..wth..n i juz found out smth..extra website given to smeone alrdy..well nvm...the grp leader shall juz rot in hell...oh im having a real sucky time in my grp right now..n im at my wits end cuz i CANT find an article...im abt to brk down soon...
im having sucha terrible migraine on the left side right now..cuz ttz whr all the mucus is stored..my nose is so badly blocked i cant even blow my nose...my god...n i keep feeling lyk sme vein is gona burst or smth..n i really cant breathe thru my nose or anything man..it sux....
HILARIE BURTON,peyton sawyer on
ONE TREE HILL,is pretty pretty pretty n pretty...i love her hair..its so curly n her body is so slim...*SIGHSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS*........n ive been missing out so much on gilmore girls..i practically stopped watching it after season 2..n its now in season 5...lyk nxt yr for my bday anybody who wants to get me a present could u juz PLS go smewhr n find me the VCDs for all the seasons of one tree hill or gilmore girls...i'll be more than happy to get them..hehe..see how thick skin i am...
met jay juz now..juz walked around n stuff..ate at macs...but now im regretting cuz ive lyk so little time left to do EoM n my maths...n 100001 of homework...ash prolly not coming to mr muthu hse on sat..fck it la..we cant even find a proper day whr all 3 of us r free...screw JC....arghs...so annoying la...ash is toking abt AFTER promos..ttz lyk so long la..but nvm i think me n jay will juz go first...met jan for awhile at yishun mrt stn oso juz now..n yea vasan was bugging her..vasan has no life...
missing chris n monan n priya...hais...im making sure i go church tis sun so i can at least see priya...n sat must go chris hse steal skirts as usual..for monan...i think he shld be coming back soon...either tis or nxt wk..gd thing...
tmw is nives's bday n i forgot...i din even get her anything...hais...not even a card...tis sux man...i MUST MUST MUST see her tmw...shucks man..was at NP juz now...shld haf gotten her a card or smth...i shld go buy mayb lyk 5 so if i suddenly remember then thr will be spares around...
i //young of the butterfly// you 9:02 PM
Sunday, August 21, 2005
FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK...
i fcking hate evrything..i haf SOOOOO fricking much to do...n i haven even done lyk anything...
-EoM...so fcking impt n the grp hasnt shared anything wid me yet
-Econs oligopoly essay
-Econs Labour Market tutorial
-Econs tuition hw
-Maths revision for fcking test on thurs which i WANA be the highest for [dya get tt..its kinda confusing]
-Lit tutorial
so much shit la...n besides tt STUDY for fcking econs...Mr Muthu is lyk damn nice..he says he will analyse econs wid me...n he tol me wad to do..i juz need to bloody make time for it..which smehow i never will...u see la..
tmw mon...i hafta stay back till 7 plus in sch cuz i gotta stay back for J2 farewell..i juz hope sadia doesnt bug me cuz i wish to complete a lot of work BY tmw....my tuition essays n rev for maths at least...n the lit tutorial which i lost the paper for oso..gosh i dun even wana stay back for the damned farewell tmw...i duno..ive never been close to the J2s...n i dun really think i can get along wid them n i can BET sadia will be bitching abt half of them tmw..fuck la k...i really dun wana be thr man...fuck..n no i dun wana see sme ppl's face...
n sadia...gawd i duno wad to do wid her...toked to mr muthu abt her today..n he said a few things...but even he doesnt wana believe tt her parents r tt extreme..i duno wad to do..on one hand i wana help her on the othr i dun...fck man...i juz duno wad to do..i feel lyk toking to pinks i duno y..but today wen i was juz thinking abt sadia the first person tt came to mind was pinks..i seriously dun believe the bullshit tt sadia tells me abt how she behaves in class...PUH LESE...GIMME A BREAK MAN....i swear she so isnt lyk tt...n she said she WASNT gona get affected by wad udaya tol her but she harped on it for 40 fricking mins...wtf..n she fcking pissed me off k..cuz of her i missed my movie..BLOODY BITCH........fck it la...n i had to take a cab hm..lyk she fcking cant get off the bloody train her fcking self n go hm herself..fcking bitch...im fcking pissed off right now....hence all the fcking swear words...fck...
i juz wana cry n bitch so bad..it seems lyk i haven got the time for it..n wen i do i need to catch up on sleep....toked to monan online tt day after sucha long time..i miss him so much k..he will be coming back soon but for a wk...thn after tt gone again..n chris is super tied down wid projects after projects after projects..i dun wana disturb her..she sick somemore..
im having either a really bad case of PMS or im juz feeling so down...i duno y...im having all this rush of emtions suddenly suddenly..i switch frm angry to happy...frm happy to lonely...frm lonely to bitchy....i duno man..i duno..im feeling so alone again..stupid dumbass feeling...
went tekka wid suse auntie n mum on sat...bought so many PUNJABI suits..am HAPPY abt tt...hahaha...bought smth BESIDES
GREEN for once...got a
PINK one too..im so so so so so happy..feel lyk wearing them evryday...now got smth to wear to church at least...hahaha...bought new heels too finally...they look quite nice..of course my mum juz has
EXQUISITE taste in shoes...need to go buy somemore...am happy wid the punjabi suits really..haha...was out the whole day on sat...came hm late n insisted on watching girivalam...not bad la...slept after tt...sun was out oso almost the whole day oso...went for tt sinda crap n met a really nice lady thr..who taught us 0.0000000001% of sociology n it was FRICKING interesting....hahaha...then went m muthu hse after tt cuz of
her....
i //young of the butterfly// you 8:03 PM
Friday, August 19, 2005
its a sucky wk..so many things happened..n my body's immune system is collapsing..im dying..gastric then.......now sore throat n flu...feel so weak..
i duno wad else to blog..im feeling so angry n hurt n i realise its my pride ttz stopping me frm doing a lot of things...
ARGHSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS...whatever la shit...
i //young of the butterfly// you 10:10 PM
Wednesday, August 17, 2005
having gastric pain since yest..finally got medicine...din attend sch 3days tis wk...im screwed..n to be vry honest i juz dun wana go sch anymore..im hating it again..dun ask y.i think its cuz of PMS..needing to be doing maths econs n stuff....n i haven done anything tho ive been hm for 3 days...hows tt?...ttz y i say im screwed...
i //young of the butterfly// you 8:10 PM
Sunday, August 14, 2005
been slipping in n out of loneliness,sadness,anger,confusion..n i duno wad else..
n im juz feeling so vulnerable right now..
feeling vry vry left out..i mean not cuz half my frens r lost or smth...more lyk im still the same old ugly duckling...yes my appearance,how i look..fat / thin...cant figure out..i wana be lyk evry othr girl..wearing a spag top.looking nice in jeans even...wearing pretty skirts n pretty tops...but i cant...cuz i feel ugly in them..even today wen i was wearing tt skirt...felt so so so conscious of myself...thought i was fat n felt miserable..hais..i feel lyk becoming bulimic...yea i kno its bad n stuff..but i juz so badly wana lose weight..i juz wana be the swan...cuz evrybody around me seems to be so beautiful..but i guess i will juz die a duckling or smth..
im gona go gelare wid chris..soon..duno wen..but i will..i badly need to pig out on ice cream..missing her n monan..
really proud priya for getting her A1..n denesh n kohila also..a gd batch tis one..
went out wid ash on sat..finally after a damned long time..toked quite a bit...n she'll vouch too tt we stuffed ourselves...wid pizza hut n mosburgers milkshakes...gawd...it was bad..oh n btw dinner was wid chris joanna joel n uma..kinda uncomfy wid uma cuz i still feel vry inferior to her...mans...n ash tol me smth vry shocking n if tt person gets into my hands tt person is oh so fcking dead...fcker..
n im juz brooding over a lot of stuff..i duno if im completely over it.i dun think i am..ttz y im juz sitting here n thinking abt it n making myself depressed..it sux..i swear it does..n i duno y i cried abt it juz now...fck it..i mean its so not worth it so y cry?..freaking shit man..it juz sux..evrything EVRYTHING was juz too much to take..i am not over it..i duno how long more its gona take..its either tt or my pms is making it a whole lot worse...
purple dinosaur..her falling down..him banging his head..DOT DOT DOT.........................................................................................................nvm..u wun understand...
was talking to miss chia tt day..n telling her how depressed n shitty im feeling n evrything else...n she tol me i shld haf juz gone to YJ..i mean thinking abt it i prolly wld haf done my maths lit econs thr in JAY'S class or my bio chem maths..i juz needed to tok tt day n she was the best...IJ kakhi..n she has to be a teacher...haha..but she's great...n i mean jay wldnt be feeling so shitty thr oso right?
really need to tok to Ani aunty oso..she hasnt come online..hasnt emailed..hasnt done a single thing..i need her reply..lyk soon..i need to confirm stuff man...hais..miss her too..
i //young of the butterfly// you 11:37 PM
Wednesday, August 10, 2005
did i ever mention kids haf the power to juz put a HUGE smile on ur face n make ur insides melt...I ABSOLUTELY LOVE KIDS!!!!!wen i was leaving after the 6 hr worship on tues,priya sent me off wid ruben who's only 1+ yrs old..n then she tol him to say bye to me...n then he said bye in SUCH a cute way..n gave me this big wet sloppy flying kiss...my insides juz melted wen i saw tt...OMG!!!......i LOVEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE kids.....sorry i juz really love them so much...n his bro silas is also soooooooooo cute...my gosh.........................ARGHSSSS...hahaha
suse auntie is forcing me to go india..n by the looks of it sathesh is gona hate me for not going...sorry...hais...feel so sucky...wish my stupid uncle cld at least go but he doesnt wana..n his hp dropped in water la...his new phone...so poor thing...mans...feel so bad for him..n sathesh cuz he is gona be alone in india...
went to shape my hair last sun...wen it was straight, it was long..but now ttz its back to curly...its horrendously short...but i shall shut up cuz i wanted to shape my hair n well the length had to go too right..feel so horrified....but nvm..i got my VVVVVV...hehehe..
sadia is pissing me off...well she always pisses me off....i duno how i stand her honestly..i mean i really feel bad la i listen to her complain n stuff..yes i do scold her back wen i think she needs to be scolded...then i bitch abt her here...i think i really need to tok to her n tell her tt she is juz irritating on the whole...gosh she has been pissing me off so badly...i mean over her hair...SO WAD?i got a haircut too..u din say anything abt it oso wad....n im pretty sure her life juz revolves around food,irritating ppl n being insensitive...gosh on fri i had to restrain frm slapping her man...she n her hair...i alrdy tol her i lyk it...n she wasnt happy...n honestly i think she looks quite modern wid it...n lyk wen tangga smiled at her to show her approval she wasnt happy cuz she wanted a VERBAL compliment...n she said she was offended tt no one in her class noticed..OMGGGG..whatever..y give a fuck abt them???....y dya need their compliments..u alrdy think they all hate u so y bother wid them..gosh..i swear i cld haf slapped her in the morn itself..waking me up frm my sleep..IRRITATING me..ughs......................................................................................................................................................................................................................
monday sucked tho i got to go out wid jay..n STUFF myself..then in the evening went for dinner wid priya's family...went for the 6 hr worship on tues..honestly it felt great...haha...i din wana go for it at first but it was fine..n priya's sisters r so cute n funny...well jeba is..n ruby is more of the bantering kind..haha...fun...n i prefer her church youths...i think dave is really funny....but he's lyk funny in a freaky way but he's still funny.n well been seeing a lot of jeremy lately...uncomfy but we seem to tok perfectly fine online...juz tt wen we see each othr at church juz cant tok..maybe its me...duno la...n i lyk her church ppl..i think they r really great ppl..moses uncle is hilarious...n by the way the two cute boys silas n ruben r his sons....n he keeps teasing me abt stealing his son's curry puff which i SWEAR i din n abt being a malayalee...OHHHHHHHHHHH im having fun playing a fool wid ruby right now................wheeeeeeeeeeeeee.....hehehe...
i //young of the butterfly// you 8:49 PM
Saturday, August 06, 2005
right now im juz feeling so damn fcking upset wid the fcking ICS ppl..i duno its lyk i try to involve myself in tt cca..but somehow smth's against me..its really sickening u kno..i mean...juz now i smsed sushma cuz i wanted to go for the NYP thing...n then she said she sent in the form alrdy..i dun blame her la..its ok..but i juz duno y i suddenly felt so fcking upset..n even tt day on mon wen i was giving my ideas for the farewell this thad fcking asshole kept lyk refusing my ideas..if u DUN want me at the meeting fcking say it..if u DUN want me suggesting anything tell me to shut my fcking mouth at the start of the meeting ok??...im not interested in hearing UR fcking suggestions or idea..n ive got a good mind to slap thad or kick him wen i see him...fcking asshole..he called me n sadia lesbians cuz we wanted to work together for the farewell...well sorry if we r lesbians r u n hafiz gays??...i think so..cuz u n him spend more time together in council N in ICS than me sadia do together...fcking bastard...go get ur meaning of lesbians right first...im juz fcking pissed...n on top of tt sadia is lyk fcking insensitive...she keeps harping on the fact tt we planned the farewell n we r not in the com...honestly thank God im not in the com cuz i can only work wid a certain 2 persons in the com...gosh...now i kno wad ppl meant wen they said ICS was all abt POLITICS...fck it la..im juz so pissed u kno..n ive got no CIP hrs..i dun even kno wads going on...n lyk wen i see the ICS ppl's profile on frenster, i juz get more n more pissed..honestly i duno y.im juz so so so upset...
i look around at evrybody they at least SEEM to be enjoying their JC lives....but im not at all..i dun haf plans on mon..n i duno y but im freaking out juz cuz i got no plans on mon...suddenly i feel so pathetic..dun ask me y...n i wana spend this time wid my IJ frens but dun feel lyk or maybe im juz to scared to ask them..i juz haf this feeling they prolly got plans on their own..n yea im finally gona say it cuz it has been bugging me for so long..
JOLENE THANX A LOT FOR BEING A GREAT WONDERFUL FREN ALL THOSE 4 YRS IN SEC SCH BUT RIGHT NOW IM VRY VRY VRY VRY BITTER CUZ U'VE BEEN PROMISING ME A LETTA FOR OVER HALF A YR BUT NOT GIVING ME ONE N I CANT BELIEVE I WAS SO FCKING STUPID TO RITE U ONE N POST IT U N I CANT BELIEVE I ACTUALLY BOUGHT TEN FCKING STAMPS CUZ I FCKING THOT WE WERE GONA RITE FREQUENTLY N I DUN UNDERSTAND Y U CANT POST THE LETTA N I DUNO Y U CLDNT HAF PUT IT IN THE SARI BAG CUZ I KNO N U KNO PINKS WLDNT HAF READ THE LETTA...SO ALL I GOTTA SAY TO U IS THANX...N IF U READ THIS DUN BOTHER TAGGING N YEA IF I ACTUALLY RECEIVE A LETTA I KNO U READ THIS BUT U KNO WAD????I DUN THINK U WLD EVEN BOTHER CUZ EVERY SINGLE TIME IN UR LIFE STUDIES WAS UR TOP PRIORITY N IT WILL BE NOW TOO SINCE UR DOING 4AS...SO IM GONA DO U A GREAT FAVOUR BY GETTING OUT OF UR LIFE N STOP BUGGING U FOR A LETTA...
finally got tt out...
right now im feeling so so so fcking low i dun understand y...i feel me n mel haf drifted apart again...i haven spoken to ash in ages but at least i kno she misses me cuz she called me the othr day..i really fcking miss her badly....haven spoken to clare in ages too..n fran doesnt seem to haf time for me...haven been spending enough time wid chris...miss having monan in spore.....im juz so upset..
wen to chris hse juz now to borrow a skirt for church n i felt so guilty cuz im always taking stuff frm her..n i dun even kno how to repay her n her family..im juz always lyk thr an extra a pest...but wen i go thr i dun feel so lonely anymore..juz now i went to swensens for prakash birthday n stuff...fair enuff i enjoyed myself cuz we were all crapping a lot..then lyk suddenly wen i reached hm i realised for my 17th bday wen i wanted a nice party my mum REFUSED...n i went to KFC for dinner..din even eat cuz i hated KFC...n my dad din even come...but for prakash bday they went to SWENSENS..n my dad took half day leave juz for tt...n i felt so so so upset again not angry but so upset...cuz i never had a birthday party...at least no nice one whr all my relatives come n enjoy...gosh im so sad la..i so badly want a party nxt yr but dun even wana suggest it to my mum cuz i kno she prolly wldnt approve...n i dun even want my bday to come cuz i dun think anyone wld remember...n on tt day i juz wana spend it wid the ppl who actually do care for me...not ppl who juz wana spend tt day wid me cuz its my bday...i want the true honest ppl ard me...n thru out the whole time i was out wid my family i was juz praying to God to take care of my dad n mum cuz i suddednly became scared tt anything cld happen....i was praying lyk a mad fcking dog...cuz i juz became so worried n scared..n i kept praying for my dad esp cuz his leg was painful n i din want him to walk so much..my god...im juz freaking out so badly...i cant take it anymore...n i was mad k...i was telling radha aunty abt how i predicted my death..n lyk i was telling her if i do go overseas my mum is gona be using all her life savings n wad if i suddenly die or smth thr??...n then all the money wld be wasted n prakash n prasaanth wun haf any education..n u haf no idea wad big dreams i haf for prasaanth...man u got no idea...no one actually except GOd..omg...i feel so disturbed..i wana whine n bitch n cry n bury myself in so much of ice cream WID someone...but who???
i //young of the butterfly// you 11:24 PM